Here’s a great, in-depth overview of Radical Marriage, including key strategies for Radical Commitment, Radical Communication, Radical Romance, Radical Intimacy, Radical Sex, and more!
Here’s what top relationship experts say about Radical Marriage…
“Radical Marriage provides clear ideas, easy strategies to follow, and a ‘radical’ new paradigm for creating the relationship of your dreams.”
— Harville Hendrix, Ph.D. and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph.D. Co-authors of Making Marriage Simple
“Radical Marriage is an accessible and clear description of the steps for relationship success with many easy-to-follow strategies for making life and love better.”
— Don Ferguson, Ph.D. author of Reptiles in Love and The Couples’ Manual
“Radical Marriage is for couples in good marriages who envision something wonderful for their future together. The Steeles have given us a manifesto and road map for marriage as a more perfect union.”
–William J. Doherty, Ph.D., Professor of Family Social Science, University of Minnesota, author of Take Back Your Marriage: Sticking Together in a World That Pulls Us Apart
“Radical Marriage is a pragmatic, how-to manual for courageous couples, presented with the grace and grit of years of experience both as a professional relationship coach and a humble and determined student of marriage.”
–Hedy and Yumi Schleifer, HedyYumi.org
“Is your marriage where you want it to be? This book will challenge you to take it to the next level, beyond where you ever thought it could be. Your marriage can be more – wonderfully more, extraordinarily more, radically more!”
— Greg and Priscilla Hunt, BetterMarriages.org
About Radical Marriage
rad.i.cal (adjective): very different from the usual or traditional
What kind of marriage do you want?
Most couples don’t want an ordinary, boring, routine relationship. They want excitement, fun, closeness, love. When we get married we make vows to be together until death do us part. That’s a long time, and sadly, half of marriages don’t or can’t keep that commitment. We have a dream or vision of how we want our life together to be. We become unhappy if we’re too far off track from that dream. If we don’t believe our dream is possible we feel hopeless, stuck, and eventually leave the marriage mentally, emotionally, and often physically.
Happiness vs. Fulfillment
It’s fascinating that what made us happy before eventually becomes no longer good enough. This is because there’s a difference between “happiness” and “fulfillment.” Happiness is transient and what makes you “happy” can change from moment to moment, while “fulfillment” is about meeting deeper needs and is more lasting. But what are these deeper needs? We need to be loved, and we need to express love. We need comfort and security but we also need variety and excitement. We need meaning and purpose, even if we don’t know what that is.
So, What is a “Radical Marriage”?
What does a Radical Marriage look like? No-one really knows because this is largely uncharted territory and individual for each couple. You can see glimpses in other couple relationships when they seem incredibly connected and in love, long after their honeymoon. These are the couples that inspire you to think “I want to be like THAT!”
We identify Six Key Elements of a Radical Marriage that we address in our book and program-
1. Radical Commitment (Chapter 3): Beyond your marriage vows, you both are absolutely, 100% committed to your marriage, no matter what, and you are as committed to your partner’s happiness as your own. You each take 100% responsibility for the relationship, your experience in the relationship and for your outcomes in the relationship.
2. Radical Communication (Chapters 4-6): You know how to effectively exchange information so that it is thoroughly understood, and you know how to resolve differences and move on from conflict to get on with the serious business of fulfilling your dreams.
3. Radical Intimacy (Chapter 7): You are completely transparent to your partner, don’t hold anything back, and share all your thoughts, feelings, wants, needs, fantasies and desires.
4. Radical Romance (Chapter 8): You continually express your love, appreciation, attraction and adoration for your partner in words and actions and don’t take your relationship for granted or allow passion to be replaced by routine.
5. Radical Sex (Chapter 9): Beyond satisfying physical urges, you consciously seek and experience emotional, physical, and spiritual connection every day, continually exploring new ways to express love and pleasure your partner and allowing yourself to be loved and pleasured.
6. Radical Living (Chapter 10): Beyond survival and comfort, you consciously design your lifestyle together, develop your shared vision and goals, devote time and resources to realizing your dreams in each moment together as well as prioritizing your goals and preparing for your future. You are aware of how short your time is on this planet and savor each precious moment of life and being together.
Is a Radical Marriage For You?
Radical Marriage isn’t for everyone. It requires a strong relationship, so if yours is struggling, focusing on functional basics must be your priority. Radical Marriage requires a willingness to take risks, overcome resistance and experience a bit of fear, which can induce stress and anxiety when you’re more wired for comfort and security. It requires inviting and embracing evolution and change, which is against the grain for those who crave routine. Radical Marriage requires TWO willing participants, so if your partner isn’t on the same page, that’s where you must start. It requires growth, effort, and learning; while strongly desired by some, others would rather watch TV, drink beer, and fall asleep on the couch.
Radical Marriage is for couples with a good relationship who strongly believe that they are together for a reason, which is to experience life to the fullest through their relationship.